this is gracelynn

I wanted to write this many days ago but I didn't have the chance.

During these days, I found out how easy it can be to lose someone so fast.
And things you might say will not be able to be taken back.
I don't know everything's fine again, things might come back to square one, and the vomitting of cusses might come back and I might hate you all over again.

I don't even know if I was scared to lose you at all, it felt quite damn surreal and I couldn't cry or think.

But then, all of a sudden tears would start rolling down my face and I would find myself worried that you might die.

Then I'd find myself thinking what will happen if you were gone.
Both the materialistic and other.

It felt like repetitive realisations and I kept hearing worse stuff every hour.
My heart pounded faster.

Now you're fine and the whole thing didn't even seem to have started at all.

I don't even know if it's just a basic thing to write or a sincere hope, but otherwise, keep remaining alright.

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